2013 Version-1Star (out of four)
Well, it may have happened. Hollywood is now officially out of new ideas. The new iteration of Evil Dead, is, in a word, awful. Now, I know many of you out there are slapping your heads and saying, "Well, what the hell did you expect? It is Evil Dead, after all." I would first say that yes, you're probably right about that. But, when you watch the original, it's so bad, so bloody, so amateurish, you can't help but sort of love it in a strange, but conspiratorial way. I actually watched the original again to refresh my memory. You can tell from its stupid, disjointed story, the over-the-top extreme gore (I can honestly say that the original is one of the goriest movies I have ever seen), the crappy synthesizer music, the generally cheap look of it all; that a very talented group of young, college students were trying to make their mark. The DIY look and feel of the original gives it a subversive vibe, but in the end, it has a witty charm to it. A wink-and-a-smile, a knowing grin that says we are all in on the joke. The filmmakers themselves say in the DVD commentary they were out to simultaneously mock the horror films of the day and yet make a new type of horror the surpasses everything yet made up to that point. They even stick in the poster for The Hills Have Eyes to say, you think you know horror? This is real horror. Many of the alumni from the original went on to great careers of their own including cult favorite Bruce Campbell, Sam Raimi, and Joel Coen. So, objectively, the original is not that great, but this is art, and subjectively, it's a lot of fun if you don't take it too seriously.
Now, the new one, it's just bad. The sad thing is,the setup would make a good film. The reason they are in the cabin is that the first victim is a recovering junkie. The rest are her friends and estranged brother who brought her there so she can get away from the temptations where she is from so she can kick her habit cold turkey. This, in itself, would be a great movie with real drama. As it turns out, the egghead of the group finds the evil book, stupidly reads it DESPITE the fact it tells him not to, and the dead rise and wreak havoc, blah blah blah. The rest of the film is an exercise in gory excess with wooden characters and stupid situations. The setups are predictable and cliche. The original is bad, but charming. This is just bad. The problem is, is that good, studio professionals made this one. At least the original has an excuse for being bad. The young guys didn't really know what they doing. The new one is like Michaelangelo doing finger paints. Instead of crappy synth music, there's an orchestra. Instead of stupid, rubber prosthetics, there's very realistic gore effects. Instead of dropping the characters into a dumb story, this tries to add backstory, also bad. It's only saving grace is that it at least the story is comprehensible that has the potential to be good. It's just an exercise in condescending excess. The producers feel their audience is stupid and not discerning, and they will buy any old crap. Don't waste your time with this and rather go see the original instead.
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